Tuesday, October 18. 2011
my constant sigh
you might as well think
i'm free
well, i'm not
this has got
the best of me
waiting for the missing link
still fond
accepting any lie
so as not
to loose the lot
but hope is a tie
not a bond
© 2011
i'm free
well, i'm not
this has got
the best of me
waiting for the missing link
still fond
accepting any lie
so as not
to loose the lot
but hope is a tie
not a bond
© 2011
I Had a Friend
I had a friend, and he got power over me by not setting any boundaries. For example, I would ask something of him, nothing really huge or important, just something ordinary, and he would ignore it. That would make me ask again, after a while, and he would either ignore it again, or feel forced to act, which he would let me know straight away. In both cases, I would start to suffer.
Most of the time, with him having ignored me again, I would wait. And wait. And wait, or maybe ask a third time, but wait nevertheless. All the time.
Then, when ever we met, he would call me demanding, and I would step right into actually being demanding, while trying to defend myself that I wasn't, if I just did not want to be totally ignored. He, on the other hand, would only see that I was demanding, but never see that he was ignoring me, and what that did to me.
That vicious circle, of course, would torture me beyond measure, mostly because I would feel the injustice of his accusation.
If he had not ignored me, but said: No!, or even told me to leave him alone, even if he had said he would not want to be friends with me anymore, and to leave him alone altogether - of course, I would have been devastated for a while, but my pain would have been as limited as the boundaries he would have set.
Being rejected is not as bad as being ignored - or being called demanding. Being ignored may be seen as rejection unlimited, just as being called demanding can be an ultimate insult.
© 2011
Most of the time, with him having ignored me again, I would wait. And wait. And wait, or maybe ask a third time, but wait nevertheless. All the time.
Then, when ever we met, he would call me demanding, and I would step right into actually being demanding, while trying to defend myself that I wasn't, if I just did not want to be totally ignored. He, on the other hand, would only see that I was demanding, but never see that he was ignoring me, and what that did to me.
That vicious circle, of course, would torture me beyond measure, mostly because I would feel the injustice of his accusation.
If he had not ignored me, but said: No!, or even told me to leave him alone, even if he had said he would not want to be friends with me anymore, and to leave him alone altogether - of course, I would have been devastated for a while, but my pain would have been as limited as the boundaries he would have set.
Being rejected is not as bad as being ignored - or being called demanding. Being ignored may be seen as rejection unlimited, just as being called demanding can be an ultimate insult.
© 2011
(Page 1 of 1, totaling 2 entries)